The morning our son turned two years old, it was almost like a switch went off, and he became a dick. And you're probably thinking, how bad can it be, he's two. Well, let me tell you - two year olds have to be the loudest, most impatient, tiny people on the planet. They have this high pitch whine that sounds pretty comparable to someone scratching a blackboard, only at a much higher decibel. They might look and seem all innocent and sweet, but don't be fooled by the cuteness and the way they look at you.
They can kind of communicate (our son speaks pretty well and signs to us), but the problem with two year olds isn't necessarily in how they're communicating to us, but in their own thoughts. Take for instance our son, he wants to listen to the song Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes. But he says something completely different, like "E-I-E-I-O" (for Old MacDonald), all while thinking he's saying "Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes". So its almost like he can't properly communicate between his thoughts and what he's putting into words or signs. He does this with food all the time too. He asks for cheese, so you give him cheese. Then he throws a fit because he think's he's asked for cereal, but he hasn't. I'm sure as a parent to a toddler you've experienced this to some degree - the child is looking at their dad, and wants their dad, but calls out "mommy!". You're also just expected to read his mind and know what he wants. So, next time your toddler asks you for something, give them the opposite of that, you've got a 50/50 chance of getting it right.
Oh and to make things worse, there's a 24 month sleep regression - yup, pretty much to the day, it happened. It seemed like we were just getting over the 18 month sleep regression (which, by the way I'm pretty confident, lasted about 2 months), and here we were again, freshly exposed to the terrible two's all while sleep deprived. I like how the sleep regressions come at times where life changes are happening for some families. For example, I was about 7 months pregnant during my son's 18 month sleep regression. As if sleeping wasn't difficult enough, being pregnant, with hormones all out of whack and pregnancy insomnia, and then adding a sleep regression on top of that. Then after the second child is born, and you think you're kinda getting into a groove, getting a routine down, and BAM! the 24 month sleep regression kicks your ass. Our saving grace was, this one didn't last long.
And for some parents (thank goodness it didn't happen to us - or at least not yet), their two year olds start getting their molars in, which I hear is the worst.
It was a good thing our son's birthday party was on his actual birthday (it just happened to fall on a Saturday), and he had all his friends, mostly from his daycare class, come over to celebrate with him. One of his "special" friends showed up and all was good with the world again. Until bed time. And every now and then, he wakes up in the middle of the night, sits up and starts mumbling away, all while still kind of asleep, and just says something like "peanut butter", and then falls back asleep, its the cutest thing even in the middle of the night, and you know all is right with the world (and parenting) again.
You know how when you first have a child and you're dealing with all the trials and tribulations of parenting, and then someone comes along and tries to give you some advice or support, and says "it gets better". Well, let me tell you, I'm sure it does, but it sure in hell gets a lot worse before it gets better! Don't get me wrong, I love my kids to the moon and back, but that doesn't mean they can't be assholes sometimes. I still love them all the same, but just thought I'd share that because I know theres a lot of you out there who are experiencing and thinking the exact same stuff, and maybe just don't wanna come out and say it.
Till the next tantrum,
*I feel like I need to add a disclaimer to this post, because people on the internet these days can take things so literally. This post is supposed to be light-hearted, and to both shed some light (for parents who haven't gotten there yet), and to let parents (who are experiencing or who have already experienced it) relate to the terrible twos. Although most of the content of this post may be negative in nature, (for those of you who know us), know that we love our son dearly, and in the grand scheme of things, he's actually really good, and not as big of a jerk as this post may make him out to be. Plus, its not him, its just the stage/phase they go through that is unpleasant.*